Kevin-ness

Kevin has started trying to wash things with a washcloth. It's really cute. He understands the concept of moving the washcloth back and forth and tries to wash walls, shelves, his high chair, etc.

Kevin has really enjoyed peekaboo lately. He will hide behind the couch and then poke his head up, and then when we growl or say peekaboo he laughs uncontrollably. Sometimes I enjoy surprising him by popping my head around the side and growling, and he thinks it's so hilarious.

He also enjoys being chased around the house. It's so cute to see him tottering on his feet as fast as he can, laughing uncontrollably, with his dad crawling behind him growling and tickling him.

Recently I bought a new pair of shoes to exercise in, and for some reason K loves them. He will come into our bedroom and get one of them, and then walk around the house with his arm in the shoe up past his elbow.

He has started to communicate by pointing with one finger, and can even communicate fairly complex things. For example, once while Ryan was in the shower, Kevin was trying to get into the locked bathroom. He came to me, said "Uh, uh, uh," (meaning "pick me up"), and then pointed the way to the bathroom. When we got to the bathroom door, he pointed at the door handle, then started pointing to the wire key up above the door frame. Another time, I was in the bedroom with the door shut, and he went to RT, asked to be picked up, and told him where to go to get to me. I think he's pretty smart!

Kevin has claimed an old Apple computer mouse and an unused printer cable as his own. He will walk around the apartment with the cord draped around his arm or hanging down from his shoulders, dragging the mouse along the floor. First pet, I guess.

On Friday Kevin had a little accident. He had climbed onto the arm of the couch, and he slipped off and bumped the windowsill. I had turned my head, so I didn't see exactly what happened, but based on the scrapes, it looks like he hit his chin on the windowsill, and his top teeth ran into his lower lip. The teeth didn't break, but the gums around his top teeth were bleeding for quite a while, and he was very, very sad. It was several hours before he started to be more normal (and at that point he seemed bent on making up for the time lost by being even more destructive and persistent), and he mainly had baby food to eat for the rest of the day so he wouldn't have to aggravate the painful area around his front teeth. The next day he didn't seem to have any problems with pain and even stuffed large amounts of muffin into his mouth (as normal) with no problems, and today he was also fine. We were torn about whether to take him to a dentist (not that anyone was open anyway). After talking with a dental school friend and two of Ryan's sisters whose kids have also had teeth knocked out or bumped (I keep insisting it's genetic), we decided to just keep an eye on the teeth for a few days and see if any of them turn dark. If that happens we will get him to a dentist. It sounds like if we had gone to a dentist that's what he would have told us to do anyway. So far everything seems fine. I kind of figured it was a matter of time before Kevin hit his teeth on something, because he just loves to climb and run and do precarious things. And he still wants to stand on the arm of the couch.

I think he's learning how to be sneaky and test us. For example, today he wanted to play with the rocks along the side of the building. Well, anyone from our apartment complex knows that this is a big no-no--we get reminded of that in the emails quite frequently. It's a reasonable rule because that's where they spray for bugs, so it really isn't a good place for kids to play. Anyway, so Kevin wanted to go over and play in the rocks, but I kept telling him no and pulling him away or blocking him. He would walk a little ways away, and then go straight back to the rocks. I think that he's testing for consistency. He wants to know if it's still against the rules three seconds later, and three seconds after that, and five seconds after that. It's something that I've noticed that he does often, and other kids do it too. Even though Kevin has tasted sand several times, he still tastes it again every once in a while (no, I don't want to know what germs are in that sand), just to make sure it's still gross, I guess. It seems like he is more determined to get into things and test us in different ways. I think part of it is that he's feeling a little bored and confined. It's just so hot and humid outside that I hate going out, but the apartment is pretty boring and small for him. Tonight I took him outside for a while because I could tell he really needed it, and it made me realize that he probably needs more outside time. Inside the apartment he has been much more whiny and difficult to deal with lately, but he was perfectly content as soon as we were outside in the open. He didn't whine once, and when we came inside he was more agreeable too. Must be a sign.

Lately he seems to look a lot like my sister Michelle did when she was little (except he's a boy). I don't have a picture of Michelle that shows what I mean, but here are a couple of Kevin that remind me of her. Maybe someone else who knew her when she was a baby will see it too.

Kevin thinks you have to walk if you're drinking water.

The bum in the air is always a favorite sleeping position.

And some more cute pictures:

I think it's so cute when he grins like this with his nose crinkled up:

having attended both classes once . . .

I think it will be a decent semester.

My mineralogy teacher is a really nice guy (which is a good thing since he's the undergraduate advisor). It looks like most classes will be based on working together in groups after having a short lecture, so for once I'm going to be in a more hands-on class. I can't think of any class that I've taken that's been like that--sort of sad, since science classes really should be like that. The basic purpose of the class is to learn the minerals in rocks and to be able to look at the minerals and tell based on the minerals how the rock was formed. I think it will be very interesting, and definitely applicable to the rest of my major.

My Calculus 3 teacher . . . is interesting. The first thing she did when she walk into the room was look at the board, throw her armload of papers and binders onto the table angrily, and then say a swear word, followed by "Erase the board!" The teacher who had been teaching the previous class had not erased the chalkboard. I immediately started feeling a little nervous, thinking that if she's going to get upset like that over something that's not such a big deal, she might be a little difficult to work with. But as the class progressed, I think I've concluded that she's actually a fairly reasonable person. She was always very respectful when we asked questions and worked on the problems. I think she just has her pet peeves about things like having class be interrupted. She was really upset both times people's cell phones rang--and as for that, she has a point. So I think as long as people do their work and do basic things like come on time and be polite during class, she's a reasonable person. I thought she did a very nice job of teaching the first lecture. I sort of had the impression that she was there to teach, not to be interrupted by cell phones and people arriving late and having to explain the syllabus.

on shopping

Recently it occurred to me that similar thoughts go through my head every time I go shopping for clothes:

Why do I bother trying on shirts that have elastic around the sleeves? My big upper arms never look good with elastic squeezed around them, and I don't need to try the shirts on to know that.

Who is determining these sizes? I do not consider myself a large or an extra large person, so why are my clothes being tagged as large and extra large?

I always come away from shopping trips feeling like I'm out of shape and not very well toned and my tummy is poochy and . . . Yes, I could do better in the area of exercise, but I don't like that I always come away from the stores feeling sad because I don't look like what "the world" says I should look like. I don't like that it affects me so much, because I really shouldn't let that bother me. I mean, who decided that women aren't supposed to have muffin tops? Do I really need to worry about what those people think of me?

I am so glad I am not a college freshman. I hope that I am more practical and mature than the girls I see at the stores shopping for their dorm room. I've always felt that there's more to life than clothes and partying, and the impression I get is that there are a lot of 18-year-olds who haven't realized that yet. I guess I look at them and listen to them and wonder if they ever think about anything of substance.

Why are there so many ugly clothes??? I think the people who design the fabric these days take all the ugliest colors, swirl them around a little bit, and then make them into low-cut-paper-thin things that resemble shirts. All I want is a plain-colored t-shirt that I can wear without three more shirts underneath it. I don't think they make them in the east.

All that being said, I've had some really good luck at Target lately. They still have the nasty ugly stuff, but I've gotten some very good deals on nice, conservative clothes there. If there was a place nearby that sold Down East Basics, I would go there too. I used to go to the BYU bookstore and buy Down East Basics t-shirts for $10 apiece, and they fit me just right and were made of good quality, thick fabric. I miss that. Next time I go to Utah, I am stocking up.

strong opinions: It's okay to be an introvert.

Disclaimer: I guess this post kind of qualifies as Marcelaine getting up on her soapbox. Well, I feel like getting up on a soapbox, so I'm going to do it. So, just to let you know, this is a slightly opinionated, getting-on-a-soapbox type of post.

I am an introvert. About the time I became a teenager, I started to get pressure to stop being so shy from all sorts of different sources--seminars intended to make middle school girls feel good about themselves, friends who were crazy and thought that meant they were confident, even well-meaning young women leaders who were very extroverted. I would go to stake dances and my leaders and extroverted people who pitied me would come up and tell me to go get out on the dance floor and be crazy and have fun. I wouldn't say much at young women's activities and a leader would tell me I needed to be more outgoing. I would go to activities arranged by the school that were supposed to unify our class, and they would have us do things that were meant to make us be more outgoing, which I just thought were silly. Most of my teenage life, I had this underlying goal to become more outgoing, and most people seemed to think that meant being crazy.

I think the problem with this is that sometimes people mistakenly believe that to be confident you have to be extroverted. I always felt like if I was more confident, I would behave like that one girl who was in the middle of the room at the stake dance doing the Napoleon Dynamite dance, that I would be yelling and clapping and being silly at the football games instead of hoping it would end soon so I could put my frozen oboe away because I was bored (oboes don't do so well in cold air). Now, I like extroverts. We need extroverts. I know many kind, amazing, talented people who are extroverts. But I think it would be horrible if everybody was like that.

I think I was in my second year of college when I completely figured out that I didn't have to give in to the pressure to be crazy. I realized that being crazy doesn't mean you're confident--in fact, I realized that sometimes people act like that when they're feeling insecure. I also realized that my quietness is a good thing. For example, I had extroverted roommates who would confide in me, and I believe my quiet nature facilitated that. In other words, it's okay that I'm a quiet person. It's how I was created, and I was given that quality because it enables me to serve God in a specific way. Once I stopped worrying about being outgoing, I was able to value my own qualities and characteristics that were given to me by Someone who had a work for me to do, Someone who knows me better than I know myself.

I imagine missionaries would understand this concept. I think there are some people investigating the church who would respond well to a missionary who is a little crazy (but still sincere), while others would respond better to a more serious, quiet missionary. Both types of people are good and serve important purposes in God's kingdom.

Like any other teenage girl, I did have some room to improve in the area of confidence. But I was confident in some ways. I frequently shared thoughts and answered questions during young women's lessons, and I think I said those things with conviction and sincerity. I wasn't very nervous or reluctant to give talks in sacrament meeting. I performed as a soloist on the piano and oboe many times while I was a teenager, and I even gave a senior recital. I wasn't scared to do that. I did get nervous sometimes, but it wasn't scary. I think as they got to know me, my young women leaders eventually recognized that I was confident in those areas. When I graduated, several of them told me how much they admired and appreciated me for the talents that I had and for my testimony. I'm also certain that my parents saw my confidence in those areas (better than I did) and encouraged me. I can't think of any time when I felt pressure from them to be more extroverted. I think they recognized that I was created to be a quiet person for a reason, and they simply taught me the gospel so that I could use the gifts I had been given.

I realize that introvert/extrovert, shy/outgoing, etc. are pretty simplistic ways to categorize people. I think that's part of the point I'm trying to make. If we automatically put people into the shy/insecure/introverted/not confident bucket or the extroverted/crazy/outgoing/confident bucket and label the first bucket "bad" and the second bucket "good", we're missing out on what they are really like. If we truly want to see people as God sees them, then we have to get to know them better than that, and as we become better acquainted with each other we start to benefit from each other's gifts.

a couple of recipes

Buttermilk Coffee Cake
2 1/2 cups all-purpose flour (I used 1 1/2 cups whole wheat flour, 1 cup white flour--it was great!)
1 1/2 cups packed brown sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
2/3 cup butter
2 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground nutmeg
2 eggs, beaten
1 1/3 cups buttermilk or sour milk (or mix 1 tablespoon + 1 teaspoon of lemon juice or vinegar with enough milk added to make 1 1/3 cups of milk; let this mixture sit for 5 minutes before adding)
1/2 cup chopped pecans, walnuts, or almonds

1. Preheat oven to 350° F. Grease the bottom and 1/2 inch up the sides of a 13x9X2-inch baking pan; set aside. In a large bowl combine flour, brown sugar, and salt. Cut in butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs; set aside 1/2 cup. Stir baking powder, baking soda, cinnamon, and nutmeg into remaining crumb mixture.
2. In a medium bowl combine eggs and buttermilk. Add eg mixture all at once to flour mixture, stirring just until moistened. Spoon batter into prepared pan. Stir together reserved crumb mixture and nuts; sprinkle over batter.
3. Bake for 35 to 40 minutes or until a wooden toothpick inserted near the center comes out clean. Cool slightly; serve warm.


From the Better Homes and Gardens Cookbook

Minestrone Soup
1. In a large saucepan, brown 1 large, chopped onion in 2 tablespoons of fat (from the sausage).
2. Add 1/2 lb. sausage, browned and drained; 8 cups beef stock or broth; 2 cups cooked, drained kidney beans; 1 teaspoon oregano; 1/4 teaspoon garlic salt; 1 bay leaf; 2 tablespoons parsley flakes (or 1/3 cup fresh, chopped); 1/2 teaspoon salt (or to taste); and 1/4 teaspoon pepper.
3. Cover, bring to a boil, and simmer 10 minutes.
4. Add 1 cup zucchini, celery, or carrots, or a  combination, coarsely chopped; 2 cups coarsely chopped spinach, swiss chard, or any other vegetables in season; and 1 1/2 cup uncooked noodles.
5. Cook 10 minutes longer or just until vegetables are cooked.
6. Serve hot. Sprinkle with grated cheese, if desired.
8-10 servings

From Deseret Recipes

the breastfeeding post

I wanted to record some of my feelings about breastfeeding. I am grateful that I have been able to breastfeed Kevin for such a long time. I am also grateful that in the past few months it has become a much more pleasant experience. Before he was born, I read a couple of books to prepare, and the impression I got from those books was that nursing a baby is supposed to be a peaceful and beautiful experience. Well, I would not describe it as a peaceful experience. Kevin's wild personality just makes that impossible. And I can definitely understand why a lot of people don't want to breastfeed their babies for very long. It can be very draining, and often boring, to be exclusively breastfeeding a small baby, and then when they're bigger it's hard because they want to move and explore while still eating. There were some points where I wondered if I was a bad mom because I wasn't in complete bliss during our feeding sessions. (Next time I'm not going to take all the stuff in those books so seriously.) But I'm grateful that we made it through that period and that now we have reached a point where we can enjoy it and it can be something that strengthens our relationship with each other. Kevin only nurses a few times a day now, and only for a few minutes each time, so it's enough that we still get to bond without me feeling like I'm always nursing him, and he also doesn't depend on nursing to get to sleep. Other than the nutritional value, I think one of the biggest benefits for Kevin has been that it's something that helps him relax and be still[ish] for a couple of minutes, which I think is good for him since the rest of the time he's so busy. He's starting to look more and more like a boy instead of a baby, but when he's nursing I get my baby back for a little while, and that's nice. I am also frequently amazed at the miraculous change that occurs when I start off feeding a grumpy, frustrated child and then suddenly a happy one runs away to play. I don't know how it works, but it's pretty cool.

I guess what I wanted to point out was that I learned that it's not bad if breastfeeding isn't always the beautiful, peaceful, empowering experience that some people describe it as. It's tough sometimes, and even if it's something you love, it's still kind of a sacrifice. But the simple yet precious moments that I have had with Kevin while he nurses have been very special.

Another thing that has been a struggle is that there is a lot of pressure out there about when to wean. In this area, I am grateful for the example of my mother, who didn't care what people thought about how long she breastfed her babies. I think there have been a lot of people who have felt pressure to wean sooner than they wanted to, and I have also known people who felt that others would look down on them for deciding to switch to formula when the baby was only a few months old. I think both cases are unfortunate. Mothering is hard enough without having to worry about that. The bottom line is that it's up to the mother and the baby, and it's nobody else's business, so that's what I intend to keep in mind. As long as we both like it, we don't have to stop. I have never had someone I know give me any pressure either way, and I am grateful for that. I am friends with a really great network of moms who use all kinds of different parenting techniques, and I think they are all really good at being supportive of each other, recognizing that we all have different challenges with parenting, and not passing judgment on each other.

just to clarify

Lately I feel like I don't have nearly as much time, or as many opportunities, to talk with my friends. I've made some dear friends in our ward, and it's always frustrating that sometimes our friendships consist of meeting eyes and a mouthed "Hi" from across the room. I guess what I need to do to rectify the situation is invite people over for dinner and playdates.

But I just wanted to let everyone know, if we haven't talked much in a while, we are still friends, and I still like you, and I want to spend more time with you. And my door is open to people who like to stop by to talk.

K, insurance, non-fiction, school, and missionaries

This is one of the toys I found for Kevin at the consignment sale (the link is to show you what it's like because I don't think most people know what they're called). He loved pushing the lids back down from the very beginning, and recently his dad has taught him how to open some of them by himself. It was interesting to see the process of him learning to do this.

We've started to notice that he says something resembling "amen" when we finish our prayers. It sounds a little more like "mom," but it seems like he's consistently saying it at the end of the prayer. I'm glad it's a word he recognizes and that we pray often enough that he notices somewhat.

I'm hunting around for insurance for myself. It turns out that part-time students don't qualify for the student insurance plan, and to be added to RT's plan is pretty expensive, so now I have to search for individual insurance plans for myself. I'm a little frustrated, because if I had realized this I might have just gone full-time. It's tempting to just go without insurance, especially considering that I only saw a doctor once in the past year and I'm healthy and young, but at the same time, it would just take one car accident or an unexpected illness to cost us a fortune in medical bills, so I feel like I need to at least have something. It's kind of overwhelming! Individual health plans seem to be much more expensive than the student plan I've had for the past two years, and they don't even cover as much and they have much higher deductibles. It seems like every once in a while major expenses come up that remind me how expensive it is to be a grown-up. It's a little depressing.

Lately I've had this urge to read some non-fiction. I haven't read a lot of non-fiction in my lifetime, but I'm feeling excited about learning about some subjects that have interested me lately. Right now I'm reading Guns, Germs, and Steel and Oxygen: The Molecule that Made the World, and it's been fun. Joining Good Reads has helped me to find some non-fiction that seems worth reading. In the past couple of years I've had several people tell me I should join Good Reads, but I didn't think I would like it, so I didn't bother. But now that I've joined, I really like it. I've enjoyed seeing the books that my friends and family have read and what they thought of them, and also being able to keep track of books that I'd like to read. Unfortunately, I'm starting school in a couple of weeks, so I don't know if I'll have time to read all the new books on my to-read list!

I'm not feeling that eager-to-have-some-schoolwork feeling that I normally have after being out of school for a while. This summer has been really fun and I've learned a lot. I've read books, spent time with my family, tried some new things, and strengthened friendships. I don't want to let school prevent me from doing that, but I also know that if I want to keep up all those things and then throw calculus and geology into the pile, I'm going to be really busy. I'm going to have to learn to prioritize and manage, and to work at a little faster pace. I'm nervous about it, but I still feel strongly that my education is important and that this is the time to get my education. I feel grateful that Ryan is so supportive of my efforts to get an education.

Thursday we had the missionaries over for dinner. It's always nice to have the missionaries in our home, but the two missionaries that are serving in our area right now are particularly wonderful. I always feel the Holy Ghost strongly and learn more about the gospel when they share a thought before they leave. We have had some very special spiritual discussions with them when they have come to our home. I always get the sense that they love missionary work and God and that they really want to help people hear and accept the gospel of Jesus Christ. I'm very grateful that we have had the opportunity to get to know them.

monkey in Relief Society

I didn't realize how different it would be to have a walker as opposed to a crawler in church. This week I had Kevin in Relief Society with me, and he was all over the place! I mean, he was all over the place before, but for some reason now it's different. Maybe it's because the mischief is at knee level instead of mostly on the floor. But anyway, I found myself giving up at some point and just taking Kevin in the hall, very close to tears because I don't want to miss Relief Society every week for the next five and half months. I bring plenty of toys as well as some snacks, and that's just not enough to keep Kevin sitting still. He's in a place that he doesn't see on an everyday basis, and he just wants to explore it. Moving is a need for him, just as much as food and sleep.

After Relief Society was over, I asked the Relief Society president how far I can let him go before it's better to just take him in the hall. Her response was that in her opinion he can go "as far as you want." She said she would rather have kids wandering around in relief society than have sisters not get to be there. I really appreciated that she said that, and I intend to keep it in mind. If I were one of the people in relief society who isn't currently bringing a small child with her, I know that I would rather have the sister there, even if the child is sometimes a distraction, than know that she's out in the hall feeling disconnected from the Relief Society. I appreciated that she recognizes that there's more to Relief Society than the lesson on Sundays. It's also getting to be with people and share support for each other, and working together to build the kingdom of God.

Honestly, I'm probably still going to stress about it. But I'm still going to try to make it to Relief Society even on the weeks when it's my turn to bring Kevin, even if he goes exploring. And I hope people won't be resentful of that. I think a lot of people will be thinking, "Been there, done that."

edited previous post

My apologies. I subscribe to my own blog in Google Reader and after looking over my previous post I realized that I had skipped a line when I was typing the recipe. It's fixed now. So if you were trying out the recipe and got a little confused, the recipe should be easier to follow now. : )

P.S. If you really are planning to try stir-frying dandelions, I don't think any less of you. It's just that the thought of eating dandelions is really weird to me. Having chewed on dandelion stems as a child (I was trying to get the "milk" inside), I can't understand why anyone would eat them. If you want more recipes like this one, you can go to veria.com/hot to find winners like dandelion clam chowder, cattail-on-the-cob, and kudzu chips.

Now if you want to find something useful to do with your dandelions, you could try making dandelion curls. (Here's a simple tutorial I just found--but my momma taught me right, so I've known how to make these for a long time!)

stir-fried dandelion stems

Today I got a free sample, and with the sample came this recipe. It made me laugh.

The real title is Spring Dandelion Greens Saute'
8 cups dandelion greens
1/2 cup chopped spring onion
3 cloves garlic
2 tbsp. olive oil
1 tbsp. butter
Sea salt and freshly ground pepper to taste

Thoroughly wash dandelion greens. In skillet, heat olive oil and butter over medium-high heat. Saute' spring onion and garlic until translucent. Add greens and cook for 3 minutes or until leaves are wilted. Garnish with salt and pepper to taste.

I'm not kidding. This is a real recipe.

surprise of the day

I think I already mentioned that Kevin learned to climb the chairs. Just now I was standing at the sink, and suddenly a cute little face popped up above the counter (which is about as high as my chest). Kevin had climbed a chair, then climbed on the table (which is right underneath the counter), then stood up using the counter. Even though he is getting into more trouble than ever, I think I am enjoying the new phase we are entering into. He does a lot of cute things.

at the doctor's office

Today Kevin had his 12-month checkup. The doctor did all the normal stuff, and then toward the end she said to me, "It's been a long time since I've seen a baby this healthy. He looks really good." That made me feel really good.