I have been thinking today about what a blessing it is to have a child in my life. I think what prompted it was that I was listening to some songs about Emma Smith. I have always had great admiration for her because she stood by Joseph through all of the afflictions they had with so much faith, and even though she was suffering greatly she worked side-by-side with Joseph to strengthen and serve members of the church. I thought about the grief she must have felt as she lost so many of her children. I don't really know how I would respond in her case, but I hope that I would draw close to RT and to the Lord. I hope that my testimony of the plan of salvation, eternal families, the resurrection, Jesus Christ, and the other principles of the gospel would be strong enough to endure such a trial faithfully and patiently. I felt a witness today that families sealed together by the priesthood can be together forever, that God's children are precious to Him, that all children who die before they have arrived at the age of accountability are saved in the Celestial Kingdom, that one day we will all be resurrected, and that our time on this earth is precious and must be used wisely. I certainly would not wish to have to deal with the death of a loved one, but I am grateful for the doctrines that have been restored to the earth that would reassure me in that situation--that have already reassured me when people I love have moved on to the spirit world.
I was grateful for the reminder that I need to be using my time for the most important things. I have really been enjoying spending time with K lately. I love his smiles that tell me that he loves, trusts, and admires me. I love making him laugh and watching him learn, explore, and grow. And as much as I hate hearing him cry, I am at least grateful that those cries mean that he wants me to hold him, talk to him, and give him attention. He really likes me! (What a boost for my self-esteem!) I hope that when I am old I will not look back on these years with significant regrets. I am analyzing the things I am doing to fill my time, and in many areas I am falling short of what I know I should be, but Christ made it possible for me to repent of my shortcomings and make a new start.
I really appreciate the gift of the Holy Ghost. I love that I can have these experiences where he teaches me principles of the gospel and helps me see what areas of my life I can improve upon--and often helps me think of specific steps I can take to do better. These are experiences that enable me to get to know my Father in Heaven and that help me to make progress in my journey to return to Him.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
RT's simulations
If you want to see a sample of what RT is doing, you can see a shot from one of his simulations here.
Monday, February 15, 2010
RT and M's goings-on, mostly involving school
RT
RT is getting into some research for his master's thesis (yes, this is a PhD program, but he can do a master's project along the way if he wants). There are a lot of big numbers and Greek letters and integral signs involved, as well as a lot of writing/using computer codes, so I don't understand much of it, but he's figuring out some interesting things. I enjoy it when he explains things that he is figuring out. He is making models to better understand how galaxies work, so he brings home some pretty cool animations. He and his advisers have also been working on a request to get some time on the Hubble Space Telescope so they can get some data for their research. Pretty cool, huh? He is taking a visualization class (one of those special classes that are only offered occasionally, not on a regular basis), which is perfect timing because it is about things that will help him with getting his thesis ready.
RT is also still in cub scouts. He moved up to Webelos with the boys who were in our Bear den last year. I think he's having a good time with them. He says that some are already close to earning their Arrow of Light.
M
I am still in school, taking Calculus II. It has been a challenge for me. I don't have a lot of time or energy (essential ingredients for success in math classes), and I just don't have a lot of interest in it like I used to. A couple of days before my first test I had practically decided that I was definitely going to quit school, but I changed my mind and I'm going to plow through this beast of a class and see if it gets better once I get into the meat of my program. I remembered that there are so many things that I really want to understand and learn about, and Calculus is necessary for me to accomplish that. I'm finishing my fourth year of college, and it's frustrating that because of various things I couldn't have planned for I haven't made a lot of progress towards a degree, and now I'd rather be doing mommy/homemaker things. But I am glad that I have this opportunity to learn, and I do feel that it is important for me to continue my education, at least for now. The general authorities have talked a lot lately about getting as much education as we can, and I feel that right now this is the way I need to obey that counsel. Learning is important to me, and even though it's hard I am grateful that I have been blessed with the opportunity to attend college. Like I said, once I get past Calculus I will probably enjoy it more. I appreciate having something to do that is for my own growth and enjoyment, outside of being K's mamamamamamama.
I am also making some changes in my plans for my education. I am currently enrolled in the Science Education program at NCSU, but I will probably be transferring to UNC to study Environmental Geology. I was looking hopelessly at my degree audit one day and thinking about the zillions of long bus rides to NCSU that I would have to take for several more years, the eight unbearable education courses I was going to have to take, the student teaching I was somehow going to have to complete while still being a mom, and the disrespectful and apathetic high schoolers I would have to teach if I ever needed to get a job. And then I started looking at majors at UNC, and Environmental Geology stuck out. I would graduate faster, the material interests me, the classes I've already taken will count towards the new major, and my classes would be a fifteen-minute bus ride away. In case you were wondering, this will be the fourth college where I have earned credit. Yeah. (Sigh.) It's a little frustrating, but I do know that there was a reason I was supposed to go to NCSU first. The only thing I can think of at the moment is that I had some small missionary moments, but someday I will understand.
I think I needed to get that out of my system.
RT is getting into some research for his master's thesis (yes, this is a PhD program, but he can do a master's project along the way if he wants). There are a lot of big numbers and Greek letters and integral signs involved, as well as a lot of writing/using computer codes, so I don't understand much of it, but he's figuring out some interesting things. I enjoy it when he explains things that he is figuring out. He is making models to better understand how galaxies work, so he brings home some pretty cool animations. He and his advisers have also been working on a request to get some time on the Hubble Space Telescope so they can get some data for their research. Pretty cool, huh? He is taking a visualization class (one of those special classes that are only offered occasionally, not on a regular basis), which is perfect timing because it is about things that will help him with getting his thesis ready.
RT is also still in cub scouts. He moved up to Webelos with the boys who were in our Bear den last year. I think he's having a good time with them. He says that some are already close to earning their Arrow of Light.
M
I am still in school, taking Calculus II. It has been a challenge for me. I don't have a lot of time or energy (essential ingredients for success in math classes), and I just don't have a lot of interest in it like I used to. A couple of days before my first test I had practically decided that I was definitely going to quit school, but I changed my mind and I'm going to plow through this beast of a class and see if it gets better once I get into the meat of my program. I remembered that there are so many things that I really want to understand and learn about, and Calculus is necessary for me to accomplish that. I'm finishing my fourth year of college, and it's frustrating that because of various things I couldn't have planned for I haven't made a lot of progress towards a degree, and now I'd rather be doing mommy/homemaker things. But I am glad that I have this opportunity to learn, and I do feel that it is important for me to continue my education, at least for now. The general authorities have talked a lot lately about getting as much education as we can, and I feel that right now this is the way I need to obey that counsel. Learning is important to me, and even though it's hard I am grateful that I have been blessed with the opportunity to attend college. Like I said, once I get past Calculus I will probably enjoy it more. I appreciate having something to do that is for my own growth and enjoyment, outside of being K's mamamamamamama.
I am also making some changes in my plans for my education. I am currently enrolled in the Science Education program at NCSU, but I will probably be transferring to UNC to study Environmental Geology. I was looking hopelessly at my degree audit one day and thinking about the zillions of long bus rides to NCSU that I would have to take for several more years, the eight unbearable education courses I was going to have to take, the student teaching I was somehow going to have to complete while still being a mom, and the disrespectful and apathetic high schoolers I would have to teach if I ever needed to get a job. And then I started looking at majors at UNC, and Environmental Geology stuck out. I would graduate faster, the material interests me, the classes I've already taken will count towards the new major, and my classes would be a fifteen-minute bus ride away. In case you were wondering, this will be the fourth college where I have earned credit. Yeah. (Sigh.) It's a little frustrating, but I do know that there was a reason I was supposed to go to NCSU first. The only thing I can think of at the moment is that I had some small missionary moments, but someday I will understand.
I think I needed to get that out of my system.
Saturday, February 13, 2010
I knew it!
Snopes.com is a fun website. It's useful when you get a forwarded email about some girl who was kidnapped or a little boy who has leukemia and the American Cancer Association will donate $1 for his treatment for every person who forwards the email to ten of their friends (not sure how they would know if you forwarded the email or not). I've also started checking it when I get invites to groups or applications on Facebook that seem questionable. Anyway, today I was checking something on Snopes and I noticed that it had several links about old wives' tales. I got some good laughs from some of them because I always had more than a suspicion that they were wrong. Here are some of them, with links to the pages.
- It takes seven years for your body to digest chewing gum. (link)
- Hair grows back darker and thicker after it's been shaved. (Some other interesting ones on this page: Split ends can be repaired [so many shampoo companies claim that they can do this], and shampoo loses its effectiveness as hair becomes accustomed to it.) (link)
- You must wait at least an hour to go swimming after you've eaten or you will get cramps and drown. Even if it was just a popsicle. Even if you are just getting in to splash around. (link)
- A tooth left in a glass of Coke will dissolve overnight. (link)
- We only use ten percent of our brains. (link)
- The average person swallows eight spiders a day. (link)
Friday, February 12, 2010
Sunday, February 7, 2010
what K is up to
K is a week and a half shy of seven months. Yes, we have begun the adventure of solid foods, and he loves it. He bounces around the whole time he is being spoon-fed and gulps it down as fast as he can get it. I'm sad that my little baby is growing up, but it's fun to see him having new experiences like this. It's a learning experience for me too.
A little over a week ago K decided to start sitting up on his own. Yes, he decided. I think he knew how before, but didn't feel like doing it because it was more fun to be on his tummy and scooting around. He went straight from arching his back and tipping over on purpose to sitting up for fifteen minutes in the same place. It is so convenient to have him sitting up on his own! For example, I can put him in the bathtub and he will sit up so I can grab the washcloth and soap without holding onto him the entire time, and when I'm putting his shirts on I can do it with him sitting up. I didn't even realize what I was missing! And of course he looks so cute and (sniff) grown up in the sitting up position.
K is also possibly working on growing some teeth. People have been asking me if he's teething since he was two months because he drools and wants to chew and suck on everything, but I think it's just that he likes to chew and suck, not that he was teething. Anyway, it does look like there are a couple of bulges that weren't there before on his bottom gums, so maybe sometime something will emerge.
Sleep has been an interesting issue lately. It's always been my biggest struggle with K, not because he's a bad sleeper (he's actually a very good sleeper), but because I can't figure him out. Every time we get some kind of routine going, he changes and the routine stops working. Until recently, the soothing routine was rocking in the rocking chair while K sucked on something--generally my finger or his thumb. But lately he only wants to play when I do that, so I've started just reading him a story and putting him in his crib. He generally protests for less than a minute before soothing himself to sleep. I am grateful that he knows how to soothe himself to sleep, but it has still been difficult to figure out what his sleep needs are. I kind of miss the rocking and sucking routine too.
K learned how to make the sound of clearing his throat, and he does it almost all the time. He thinks it's very interesting.
Last Sunday RT did a photo session of K. He got some nice ones.
Lately he's been sticking out his tongue a lot.
A little over a week ago K decided to start sitting up on his own. Yes, he decided. I think he knew how before, but didn't feel like doing it because it was more fun to be on his tummy and scooting around. He went straight from arching his back and tipping over on purpose to sitting up for fifteen minutes in the same place. It is so convenient to have him sitting up on his own! For example, I can put him in the bathtub and he will sit up so I can grab the washcloth and soap without holding onto him the entire time, and when I'm putting his shirts on I can do it with him sitting up. I didn't even realize what I was missing! And of course he looks so cute and (sniff) grown up in the sitting up position.
K is also possibly working on growing some teeth. People have been asking me if he's teething since he was two months because he drools and wants to chew and suck on everything, but I think it's just that he likes to chew and suck, not that he was teething. Anyway, it does look like there are a couple of bulges that weren't there before on his bottom gums, so maybe sometime something will emerge.
Sleep has been an interesting issue lately. It's always been my biggest struggle with K, not because he's a bad sleeper (he's actually a very good sleeper), but because I can't figure him out. Every time we get some kind of routine going, he changes and the routine stops working. Until recently, the soothing routine was rocking in the rocking chair while K sucked on something--generally my finger or his thumb. But lately he only wants to play when I do that, so I've started just reading him a story and putting him in his crib. He generally protests for less than a minute before soothing himself to sleep. I am grateful that he knows how to soothe himself to sleep, but it has still been difficult to figure out what his sleep needs are. I kind of miss the rocking and sucking routine too.
K learned how to make the sound of clearing his throat, and he does it almost all the time. He thinks it's very interesting.
Last Sunday RT did a photo session of K. He got some nice ones.
Lately he's been sticking out his tongue a lot.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
post-Christmas trip
I don't think I was expecting to go home for Christmas this winter, but sometime a few months ago we found out about a sale that Southwest was having, so we were able to get a good deal on plane tickets to go see a couple of RT's sisters and my family on January 7-11. We had a really nice time, and I was so grateful that we could go.
The plane flights went well, although K didn't get especially good naps. RT's sister picked us up from the airport and we stayed the night at her house. She has a baby a couple of months older than K, so it was fun for all three of us to meet him. We had fun listening to her kids tell us about all sorts of things and just chatting together.
The next morning we went to Provo and RT talked to some previous professors for a while. We also stopped by the PS100 TA lab where I worked during our dating/engaged days. My supervisor and a couple of TAs I worked with were there. Most of the TAs I worked with don't work there anymore. I talked with my supervisor for a while about my plans with finishing my degree. She said she likes it when people come back and say hi, so I was glad we stopped by for a couple of minutes.
Being back at BYU was not what I expected. I sort of expected it would be like coming home and I would be excited to see all the places where I spent so much time. But it actually wasn't that exciting. For some reason it didn't matter as much as I thought it would. I think it was a confirmation for me that I'm not supposed to be there anymore. I was sad that I didn't have time to see any of my old friends, though.
There was one thing that struck me almost immediately. Here, whenever I go anywhere with K I get lots of comments and oohs and aahs about the cute baby. At BYU I didn't get that at all. Maybe that's because a baby isn't such a novel thing for people there. Sort of interesting.
We had dinner with RT's sisters and their families. Here's a picture we took of K with two of his cousins:
Soon my parents and sister arrived and met K for the first time. It was so great to see them, and K really liked them (can't say I blame him--I like them too). We rode home with them to my parents' house.
We got to my parents' house pretty late, and then my dad went to pick up the rest of my siblings, who were staying at my grandparents' house. When they got back, I was feeding K, so they all had to wait to meet him. It was so fun when they got to see him. I think everyone held him for a little bit and we all just talked a lot and watched K be cute. For some reason my brother (7 years old) couldn't stop laughing when he was holding K. Maybe it was just so strange for a 7-year-old uncle to be sitting there holding his nephew.
The next day we mostly just hung out at home. We did go shopping for a little while, and one of my sisters babysat K (you can imagine how not reluctant she was). In the evening we did our traditional sibling gift exchange, which had been postponed until we came, and opened some presents from my parents.
The next day was Sunday, and we went to church at my family's ward. Let me just say, I am so jealous of the mother's room they have. It was nice and open, and it wasn't the coldest room in the building. It was weird to be in a ward that isn't mostly composed of graduate/med school/dental school students and their families. It makes me a little nervous to someday be in a ward where the people aren't all the same age as me.
After church we went to my grandparents' house for dinner. K met Grandma and Grandpa and then took a REALLY long nap. Poor kid--his sleep was sort of neglected on this trip sometimes, and he was a very good sport about it. We had a really nice time talking about books, memories of Kimberly, ID (where I grew up--as did several generations back on my Dad's line), and what we all had learned in the past year.
Monday we went home. It all went by too fast, and it was sad to leave my parents, but I'm grateful that we got to go. I must say, it is not as relaxing to travel with a baby. All he wanted to do was play and lick everything in sight. But he was happy the entire time we were flying.
And here are some pictures from spending time with my family:
K squared. (K is named after my dad.) I had been looking forward to them meeting for a long time.
One thing I miss about Utah is that in most places there's a huge mountain range taking up half the horizon.
Pictures taken at my grandparents' house:
Can you tell it was bedtime?
K with his uncle and aunts:
The plane flights went well, although K didn't get especially good naps. RT's sister picked us up from the airport and we stayed the night at her house. She has a baby a couple of months older than K, so it was fun for all three of us to meet him. We had fun listening to her kids tell us about all sorts of things and just chatting together.
The next morning we went to Provo and RT talked to some previous professors for a while. We also stopped by the PS100 TA lab where I worked during our dating/engaged days. My supervisor and a couple of TAs I worked with were there. Most of the TAs I worked with don't work there anymore. I talked with my supervisor for a while about my plans with finishing my degree. She said she likes it when people come back and say hi, so I was glad we stopped by for a couple of minutes.
Being back at BYU was not what I expected. I sort of expected it would be like coming home and I would be excited to see all the places where I spent so much time. But it actually wasn't that exciting. For some reason it didn't matter as much as I thought it would. I think it was a confirmation for me that I'm not supposed to be there anymore. I was sad that I didn't have time to see any of my old friends, though.
There was one thing that struck me almost immediately. Here, whenever I go anywhere with K I get lots of comments and oohs and aahs about the cute baby. At BYU I didn't get that at all. Maybe that's because a baby isn't such a novel thing for people there. Sort of interesting.
We had dinner with RT's sisters and their families. Here's a picture we took of K with two of his cousins:
Soon my parents and sister arrived and met K for the first time. It was so great to see them, and K really liked them (can't say I blame him--I like them too). We rode home with them to my parents' house.
We got to my parents' house pretty late, and then my dad went to pick up the rest of my siblings, who were staying at my grandparents' house. When they got back, I was feeding K, so they all had to wait to meet him. It was so fun when they got to see him. I think everyone held him for a little bit and we all just talked a lot and watched K be cute. For some reason my brother (7 years old) couldn't stop laughing when he was holding K. Maybe it was just so strange for a 7-year-old uncle to be sitting there holding his nephew.
The next day we mostly just hung out at home. We did go shopping for a little while, and one of my sisters babysat K (you can imagine how not reluctant she was). In the evening we did our traditional sibling gift exchange, which had been postponed until we came, and opened some presents from my parents.
The next day was Sunday, and we went to church at my family's ward. Let me just say, I am so jealous of the mother's room they have. It was nice and open, and it wasn't the coldest room in the building. It was weird to be in a ward that isn't mostly composed of graduate/med school/dental school students and their families. It makes me a little nervous to someday be in a ward where the people aren't all the same age as me.
After church we went to my grandparents' house for dinner. K met Grandma and Grandpa and then took a REALLY long nap. Poor kid--his sleep was sort of neglected on this trip sometimes, and he was a very good sport about it. We had a really nice time talking about books, memories of Kimberly, ID (where I grew up--as did several generations back on my Dad's line), and what we all had learned in the past year.
Monday we went home. It all went by too fast, and it was sad to leave my parents, but I'm grateful that we got to go. I must say, it is not as relaxing to travel with a baby. All he wanted to do was play and lick everything in sight. But he was happy the entire time we were flying.
And here are some pictures from spending time with my family:
K squared. (K is named after my dad.) I had been looking forward to them meeting for a long time.
One thing I miss about Utah is that in most places there's a huge mountain range taking up half the horizon.
Pictures taken at my grandparents' house:
Can you tell it was bedtime?
K with his uncle and aunts:
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